Fair Witness
An important part of creating a safe space is adopting a 'Fair Witness' attitude. This means being an impartial and fair witness, both to yourself and others. You are aware that you are always communicating and that you always have influence, so you `try` to defer judgement and let the other person be themselves.
In the Fair Witness attitude, you are fully present and available to others without wanting to help, judge or change. You accept what is, without wanting to change or control. This creates a safe environment where people feel free to be themselves.
To get into the Fair Witness attitude, there are a few steps you can follow.
- Maintain a peripheral vision so that you are aware of everything going on around you.
- Adopt a neutral physiology to show the other person that you are impartial.
- Let go of your own mental models so that you are open to the experiences of others.
- Create an imaginary boundary between yourself and the other person so that you give the other person space to be themselves.
- Remember that everything the other person says, does, feels and thinks is okay.
And finally, only ask open-ended questions and don't direct anything. This way, you give the other person space to be who they are.
